THE NO BULLSHIT MUSIC FESTIVAL SURVIVAL GUIDE
BEFORE EVEN LEAVING THE HOUSE MAKE SURE YOU HAVE:
Your tickets. No we’re not fucking kidding. It’s not funny, dammit.
Your friends that are riding with you. No we’re not kidding. It’s not funny, dammit.
Mobile phone.. lets face it they either gets lost or they don’t work, so write down your mates number somewhere.. paper, boobs, arse.. anywhere! If you get lost you’ll be pretty fucked, more fucked than the state you will be in.
WHEN YOU ARRIVE AT THE FESTIVAL:
- If driving.. WRITE DOWN WHERE THE FUCK YOU PARKED! You swear (and your bff swears, and everyone in the GD car SWEARS) that you and all of them are going to remember. You won’t. Trust us.
- Once inside the festival, everybody agree on a designated “FFM” (Fuckin Find Me) spot – where if you get separated, you can all meet up there as a last attempt.
- TICKET- MAKE SURE YOU HAVE THE TICKET. Do not leave it all the way in the car or on whatever transport you take to the festival, that will be a real problem. And less drinking time.
DO’S AND DONT’S:
- DO- try to remember exactly where you camped. It’s amazing the number of people stumbling round in the dark with no idea where their tents are. Tie something distinctive to your tent or put up a flagpole.
- DON’T- camp near the Portaloos, obviously.
- DO- pack baby wipes! festivals loos, there is no getting around it, they are GROSS.
- DON’T- rely on one change of clothes! It’s already a slog having to cart your tent, sleeping bag and beer into the camping area from the car park – let alone a bag full of clothing. But trust me: pack for summer and it WILL rain.